Welcome to my Musings!

I’m Xhey of XBB, and I’m thrilled to welcome you to my blog.

I provide gender affirming care so folx can move through the world satisfied with their appearance, confident that who they are matches how they are perceived.

Since respectability politics are constantly projected on me and my clients, it is hard to find a psychologically safe balance between authenticity and enforcing privacy boundaries.

In my work as a Natural Hair Specialist and educator, I teach people to stop apologizing for the trouble they’ve been groomed to believe they cause. From a young age, Black people are taught that their hair is difficult for other people to manage. Every single client I’ve had has apologized to me for the trouble. Stop it! Your hair and scalp are beautiful and resilient.

Also, you never need to feel ashamed of the state of your hair and scalp because the mere fact that you are still here means that your body mind and spirit survived whatever you had to push through to arrive to this moment. Your hair may be matted, broken, or missing, but you are present, willing, and able. Help me help you heal. There is no standard of beauty—there is only the beauty you hold within you. Maybe you’re just guarding it so tightly that you’ve hidden it from yourself. Your appearance does not determine your worth.